8 Steps to a Collaborative Divorce
People end their marriages for various reasons. Although TV shows and movies paint divorces as the center of hate and drama, this is often far from the truth.
You do not need to necessarily hate your spouse to get a divorce. In fact, many divorcing partners remain friends throughout the process.
If you are still friendly with your spouse, you can strategically avoid the legal hoops where a judge decides your fate; you can opt for a collaborative divorce. A collaborative divorce permits you and your partner to work closely to share your assets and liabilities without third-party interference.
This piece discusses what a collaborative divorce entails and the steps to achieving it.
Understanding a Collaborative Divorce
A collaborative split involves the splitting parties liaising to determine the terms of their divorce. They do not leave their fate in the hands of a judge. Instead, they collaborate to resolve issues like splitting their marital assets, spousal support, and the custody and parenting plan to adopt if the union has produced kids.
There are numerous advantages to a collaborative divorce. You and your partner can extensively negotiate issues until you find a befitting and satisfactory solution.
It also saves time because, unlike the court system, where you need to wait weeks or months between hearings for the judge to decide various issues, you can quickly resolve issues within yourselves. Thus, collaborative splits are often quicker.
Ultimately, collaborative divorce makes your marriage dissolution less stressful and emotional. Instead of fighting, you will negotiate issues logically and peacefully.
How to Achieve a Collaborative Divorce
The collaborative divorce process somewhat differs from the standard divorce that the court handles. This segment gives an insight into how to achieve a collaborative divorce:
Engage a Reputable Lawyer
Even if you desire a collaborative split, your first role is to retain a reputable local divorce attorney. The lawyer will help you focus on issues throughout the process.
Further, your legal representation will ensure you complete every agreement and documentation correctly and formally. Their input will make the documents and agreements legally enforceable. Thus, your partner needs to have legal representation as well.
Begin on Good Terms
The most distinguishing factor of a collaborative split is commencing on good terms with your partner. While you do not necessarily have to be best friends, you should be able to sit around the same table in a room to discuss challenging issues without a hint of bitterness.
To avoid conflict when entering the collaboration phase, be honest about your intentions of resolving the issues amicably with your partner.
It is a critical aspect of the process. Your lawyer will usually make you sign a collaborative participation agreement and good faith agreement with your partner before the process commences. This formal agreement will ensure no one takes undue advantage of the other.
Organize a Dissolution Team
You must organize a team of experts to help you throughout the marriage dissolution phase. Your needs will determine the composition of the team. Apart from your respective attorneys, you can also work with child custody experts, professional mediators, counselors, financial advisors, and appraisers.
These professionals will liaise with you to resolve the details of dividing your assets and child custody matters. They will also be professional during the negotiations. They will help calm your nerves to ensure the divorce is genuinely collaborative.
Provide Information
You will have to start disclosing information after organizing your team. You and your partner will get documentation of all your property, assets, and liabilities from before and during the union. Further, you will provide contracts that could influence your split, like pre- and post-nuptial deals.
It is advisable to be comprehensive in this process. “The court may rule your divorce settlement invalid if you conceal essential information, like hiding a pension or bank details,” says divorce law attorney Matthew Dolan of Dolan Divorce Lawyers, PLLC. You must consciously disclose every relevant information at this stage for your divorce to stand in court.
Create a Priority List
After you have supplied your lawyer with all the relevant details about your union, you will meet and discuss your aspirations for the divorce. Although compromise is central to a collaborative split, you should not give in to everything.
Discuss things that are crucial to you with your legal representative. For instance, you may want to retain the family home or keep any vehicles from the union. Also, if you began a business during the marriage, tell your lawyer if you want to share ownership after the divorce or become the sole proprietor.
List your priority assets. If you want spousal support, state the amount you want. If the union has produced kids, tell your attorney your preferred custody arrangement.
The priority list will serve as a compass for your negotiations. It will also give you an insight into areas of compromise and where you should not budge by any means. It can also serve as a preliminary offer to your partner during the first negotiation meeting to see their reaction.
Commence the Negotiation
After setting up all modalities, you can negotiate with your partner. Apart from you and your spouse, your respective attorneys will be available during the first meeting to present your initial offers to each other. Other members of your divorce team can also be present at the meetings to offer expert opinions on crucial topics like children’s best interests and asset valuation.
You will highlight the elements of every offer you consent to and the ones you want to change during the negotiation meeting. You will need to attend multiple meetings before resolving all the issues. You will need to meet your legal professional in between to review your strategy and highlight likely compromises.
Tender the Agreement to the Court
After agreeing to the settlement, your lawyers will turn it into a legal contract that meets your jurisdiction’s prerequisite for divorce settlements. You and your spouse will sign and submit the document to the court for approval.
If the document meets legal standards, the judge will endorse it as your formal divorce settlement. You will complete your split without attending any hearings.
Adopt a Collaborative Approach to the Divorce
A trial is unsuitable for divorce if you and your partner are still amicable. Collaborating to reach a satisfactory settlement for both parties is always preferable.
Speak with a reputable local attorney about the appropriateness of collaborative divorce in your region. During your initial consultation, your lawyer will tell you if a collaborative divorce will work for you.
